Huey

Huey filed a flight plan. He always files a flight plan. Nobody asked him to. Nobody else does. Huey considers this everyone else's problem.

The plan was: feeder 3, then feeder 7, then a quick loop over the bay before the thermals shift. Estimated flight time: four minutes. Huey was airborne in two, which is how he found out that feeder 3 had been moved three inches to the left. This took him completely by surprise. The feeder did not move. Huey did. Into the feeder. At full speed. In front of everyone.

He recovered immediately. He always recovers immediately. The key is to never slow down, because if you slow down someone might have time to ask if you're okay, and then you'd have to admit you didn't see the feeder. Huey does not admit things like that.

He hit feeder 7 at approximately 40 mph, drank in 1.3 seconds flat, and was already gone before anyone could comment. The sign on the post that says EARLY BIRD GETS THE GOOD NECTAR has his name carved into the wood beneath it. Not by Huey. By everyone else, because it was already true.

The flight plan said four minutes. He finished in three. Huey logged this as a personal record. It was not a personal record. He logs everything as a personal record.